It’s 12th August 2010 and here is the news, in song format, by Cats in Paris! Today’s theme, erm… kind of Electro Tetris Punk, I think.

Head of the Iraqi Army General Zebari told a conference in the capital they were not ready. Read more…

Osama Bin Laden’s chef sentenced to 14 years. Read more…

Iran sanctions help their government, or so it appears. Read more…

Russia deploys missiles to protect the Abkhazian rebel folk. Read more…

Marinated cat was rescued from his owner’s car covered in some oils and spices ready for dinner. Read more…

Man in Massachusetts has a pea plant in his lungs. Read more…

There’s a sharp drop in numbers of home repossessions from April to June. Read more…

Coalition says that Labour’s legacy “a crime.” Read more…

Mark Berry, AKA Bez from the Happy Mondays, strangled his ex-girlfriend. Money was missing, he went mad, assaulted her, then left the flat, came back to kick down the door: “he was insane!” Read more…

David Beckham set to have one last international game so that fans can say goodbye at Wembley stadium. Read more…

Manchester band Cats In Paris start to sing the news headlines every single day from August. “If we combined music and headlines we figured we could provide a useful service,” says singer Michael J Watson, speaking to the BBC. Read more…

US don’t want faster broadband. Read more…

Imagine how shit it would be if this dude strangled you.